Cozy Tales: 32. Graviditas Redux

I remember Lauren calling me at work and inviting me home for some fine lunchtime lovin’. I can vividly remember sitting at my desk at the ISP and getting the call, and I can vividly remember the surprise and wonderment at finally getting said call. You see, Lauren was fond of telling people that pregnancy was a nine month up and nine month down affair, meaning that while it took nine months to grow and deliver a baby, it also took nine months for a woman’s body to return to normal. Here it was eight months post-partum and I felt like I had won the lottery.

I also remember sitting on the couch with Lauren some time later reading an alphabet book to Meghan. We were the picture of family togetherness. Meghan would stare lovingly as I’d turn the page and read the words with happy Daddy abandon.

“’M’ is for Mommy who loves you so much.”

“’N’ is for Nurse who helps us get better.

“’O’ is for Octopus that lives in the sea.”

“’P’ is for…” Lauren interrupted, “…pregnant which is what Mommy is!”

A silence rolled over the room while I processed this statement. We hadn’t even adjusted to having one baby in the house. Life was just starting to get back to normal. Another baby? I was rarely speechless, but I didn’t have much in the way of witty retort for this one. I think “Wow” was all my suddenly enfeebled brain could muster. Being a lover of words, I’m pretty sure that I followed up that gem up with a dramatic pause, and then the ever eloquent, “Cool”.

Once again it was Daisy who had known first. Lauren had been sitting with Meghan on the couch a few days earlier and Daisy had jammed her nose into Lauren’s crotch. Oh No Lauren had thought. Please Daisy no – I can’t be pregnant again, as if Daisy had some mystical power to control Lauren’s body. Daisy wasn’t interested in Lauren’s pleading. She loved puppies and was no doubt happy to have another one on the way. Lauren took three separate pregnancy tests convinced that Daisy was wrong.

Daisy was never wrong.

While a happy occasion, it is also a bittersweet memory, for it served as an  unspoken announcement that I would never again get a why don’t you come home for lunch call.

Long lunches aside, there was work to be done, since we had to convert the last remaining bedroom from Daisy’s personal guest room to another baby’s room. This time we scored all sorts of second-hand stuff, from cribs to changing tables and everything in-between. Lauren set about painting the room while I scolded her for breathing paint fumes while pregnant. We were pros at the pregnancy thing now, and since this was our second baby, just a tad bit more easygoing about things.

Daisy threatened to trip up Lauren by again making her beds in the hallway, and Cozy dutifully started hoarding food in the couch. It was all old hat though, and we took it all in stride.

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